Stillness is boring. Sitting ideal makes us fidgety. Especially in this gadget age, even when we have really nothing to do, we still occupy our minds constantly in that in-between time. Because feeling bored seems like a waste of time and brings uneasiness. It’s as if we don’t know what to do with ourselves, because of course we should do something. Think about the last time you felt bored. What do you do when you get bored? Watch a movie, read a book, text your friends, play, sleep? How many of you just sat there/ lay down, and allowed yourself to do absolutely nothing? It actually isn’t the time-waste experience you fear it to be. You can even memorize poems when your mind is seemingly still. Okay that sounds random, but hear me out.
Two days ago, in the middle of the day, I felt sleep deprived and my eyes tired. I wanted to take a break from the screen, but how could I take a break during the day? What else are you supposed to do then, if not work! I thought of lying down for a bit and listening to a podcast in the meantime - that seemed liked a reasonable use of time in that situation. As it turned out, not only my eyes but my brain was exhausted too. Even after trying a couple of different podcasts, none could grab my attention. I needed something lighter. I had another idea - if I can’t educate myself, I could at least keep myself entertained. Looking in my phone or reading a book wasn’t an option for my fatigued eyes, music was the next best option. But sadly a couple of songs in and I still wasn’t getting in the groove. I finally took the hard decision to press pause. I just lay there, not knowing what to do. I wasn’t particularly sleepy, but I had to now try because my sleep-deprived brain wasn’t allowing me enjoy even fun things. I closed my eyes, trying to summon some sleep, but you can’t just fall asleep just like that in the middle of the day. I’m lying down, in silence, with my eyes closed. I’m bored.
Let me clarify already, I’m not marketing boredom as some sort of a ‘spiritual experience’, but you have to have that experience to define it for yourself. And have that experience you must, that I can recommend.
Your body is stagnant, but your brain isn’t yet. You sit there with your thoughts still rushing. You’ll probably think about something you read on Twitter and your response to that opinion. Or the movie that’s releasing in a month and you’re excited to watch. You end up thinking about that one time when you fell on the platform while getting down from the train. Or why the hell you’re wasting your mid-day when you have so many pending things on the agenda. I somehow caught hold of this long lost memory, which made me realize what a relaxed brain can do. My anxious self was finally at ease as I allowed myself to get bored in a very long time.
Story time ~ In fifth grade, my English teacher once assigned me the task of narrating this (unappealing) poem in class, that too the next day. Once I was back home, I had only a few hours to memorize this medium length poem about books or library or something, which I was just unable to remember well. I had to sleep because it was night already, and I had done my best in the available time. I didn’t want to worry about it anymore and I was strangely confident that even if I mess up my teacher won’t say anything because she hopefully would also acknowledge the time constraint. A bit concerned, but calmly I sleep. I wake up the next morning, feeling like I dreamt of the poem for my entire duration of sleep. First thing in the morning I try narrating the poem to myself. Turns out I have magically memorized the entire poem in my sleep. I narrated the poem perfectly in class. The teacher was satisfied, but I was astonished at what I had experienced.
This thought reminded me of this podcast episode that also talked about how people reported learning and assimilating stuff in their sleep. And also why students are recommended proper sleep before any exam. One thought led to another and this bouncing of thoughts continued till I fell into slumber. Couple of hours later I’m ready to start from where I had left my to-do list.
When you have some ‘spare time’ or feel, let’s say, uninspired to do anything, you could proceed in two ways depending on the type of person you are. If you are a productivity geek, you could use this ‘free’ time to do something light but also benefitting in some way. Like watching a documentary, reading a book, learning vocabulary of the new language you’re learning, listening to podcasts, etc. If you’re the regular person with social media, more often than not the first place you go when you’re waiting in a queue, sitting idle or are too tired to do any work is your Instagrams and Twitters and Snapchats and what have you. Or go out for a run, watch a movie, or catch up with friends. Both these types of activities help you relax your mind and counter boredom. But as you might have noticed, these of course are still activities. They might require lesser effort or could help you gather some inspiration, but are nevertheless activities which require participation of your brain. Social media and the likes will keep your brain occupied and distracted, working at suboptimal levels, while the ‘productive’ cum fun tasks require your mind to be engaged in this new ‘rejuvenation retreat’. Point being that you are not allowing your brain to loosen up even in your fun zone.
We are almost scared of facing the silences. We don’t want to face our own thoughts, or give them space to run wild. Because it feels as if we’re doing nothing and throwing it down the drain in spite of having myriad of other possibilities available. But once you cross this barrier of fear, your brain breaks free from the trivial chains into a playground where the connections run wild. Past, present and future blend into each other. You finally have time to think about the distant time when this one teacher disliked you, and what could have been the reason. You think about what you want to have for lunch tomorrow, or what you would like to wear for your friend’s wedding, or what big problems of the world would you like to solve? From the reasons that shaped your grandfather’s psyche to what steps you need to take in the next five years to achieve the kind of life you envision for yourself - these thoughts won’t brew while doom scrolling or during your Python MOOC. These kinds of random yet systematic thoughts are stimulated in a space generous enough for their processing. While the usual activities will give you tangible outcomes once you’re done with them, these new and old network of thoughts that will get processed/ constructed in a ‘void’ will give you a better sense of yourself. And I personally would like to rank figuring out my being higher than say baking a muffin.
Knowing one’s essence and being and what not sounds too spiritual, and that’s why it is crucial to be mindful of the adage ‘excess of everything is bad’. The phenomenon could possibly exist as a subset in the domain of (quasi) mindfulness, if I may say so, but this is no meditation. You also don’t have to fall into day dreaming during work because boredom is supposed to reconfigure your brain or something. Some people might feel more fulfilled in let’s say constantly working for making themselves and those around them better. And there’s nothing wrong in baking muffins. But all I learnt from my experience is to not be afraid of letting myself fall into that void of seeming inactivity once in a while. Not getting intimated of facing my random thoughts. Allowing thoughts and ideas to foster, converge and diverge. Whatever your approach might be, it’s surely worth exploring the realm of stillness. The dimension when your body is still but your mind runs free.
Check this video out if you’re also interested in a sciency reasoning.
Next time you’re bored, allow yourself to be. This isn’t even an advice ;) Don’t listen to me, try it for yourself. Nullis in verba. (Ssup, fellow Naval simps)